Okay,this particular post has been long overdue. Ive been meaning to write about it for a long time but the combined efforts of Captain Procrastination and Lady Laziness have deterred me from my path. But now I'm back on track, so here goes nothing...
Ever since I was a kid, I've witnessed people from both genders and different age groups argue over this social issue with a lot of aggression and enthusiasm only to end up without any consensus. What would begin as a normal suggestion to the discussion would eventually turn into a full-fledged debate...which frankly speaking lead to nowhere. So I have taken up the task to address this issue and finally prove to the world out there as to why (considering all the situations that one can even think of) .....
Why Batman owns Superman
Oh yeah... that's right.
(1) Batman is human and unlike Superman he isnt an alien from some other planet. This fact instills within us humans a hope that we don't need superpowers to become a superhero.
(2) We all know that Superman is extremely strong ... so any fight he gets into isn't that interesting as we're all like "Okay the man of steel is surely gonna win this one...all thanks to his brawn power. Bah! How predictable". But in the case of Batman we as viewers are more interested to watch the fight as Batman resorts to his intellect and intelligence to fight opponents who are way stronger than him. And it's this very fact which makes us all go like "Holy shit!! That was so fucking awesome! How did he do that? :-O "
(3) Lets have a look at their disguises okay. All that Superman does is change into formals and put on a pair of glasses and voila he becomes Clark Kent!Wow that makes him so bloody unrecognizable! Kinda like SRK from Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi ..and we all know how that movie was ridiculed. On the other hand nobody knows that Bruce Wayne is actually the real Batman which just proves as to how careful and efficient he his when it comes to hiding his identity which is of utmost importance when you're a superhero.
(4) Superman wears his red briefs over his costume.I think that statement speaks for itself.
(5) Superman's powers were like a gift..he was born with them. Batman had to work hard...train in martial arts...design his gadgets,his Batmobile,an effective costume which was not only bullet-proof but would also help him glide in air without the help of any shitty gadget like a jetpack which probably would be the first option on any other humans mind.
(6) Superman can't even woo a simple woman like Lois Lane. All he does is stay in the friend-zone and smile like a wuss. Batman, on the other hand is a natural chic magnet. His persona and his charisma as Bruce Wayne is irresistible to any woman. Hes the very basis on which the character of James Bond was designed.
(7) Superman's best opponent was Lex Luther who was nothing but a mortal businessman and even then he finds it hard to defeat him.But Batman has an entire cabinet full of enemies its deadliest being the infamous Joker who as everybody knows has some amazing tricks up his sleeves at all times. That makes him more challenging than Lex Luther and hence more hard to defeat. Yet Batman even manages to do that.
(8) Superman lost his parents when he was just born.He never knew them at all so he didn't have to live with any sort of grief. Batman on the other hand actually witnessed the murder of his parents and also realized that in a way it was his fault that they died. Grief + Guilt => more sympathy towards Batman.
(9) It isn't difficult to defeat Superman. All you need to do is carry a green rock in your pocket and tell him its Kryptonite. The idiot will believe you and stay away from you. You need to be really intelligent to defeat the Dark Knight though.
(10) The popularity votes that the Batman movies garner are way more than the Superman movies.
Ladies and Gentlemen... I think we have a clear winner.
Ever since I was a kid, I've witnessed people from both genders and different age groups argue over this social issue with a lot of aggression and enthusiasm only to end up without any consensus. What would begin as a normal suggestion to the discussion would eventually turn into a full-fledged debate...which frankly speaking lead to nowhere. So I have taken up the task to address this issue and finally prove to the world out there as to why (considering all the situations that one can even think of) .....
Why Batman owns Superman
Oh yeah... that's right.
(1) Batman is human and unlike Superman he isnt an alien from some other planet. This fact instills within us humans a hope that we don't need superpowers to become a superhero.
(2) We all know that Superman is extremely strong ... so any fight he gets into isn't that interesting as we're all like "Okay the man of steel is surely gonna win this one...all thanks to his brawn power. Bah! How predictable". But in the case of Batman we as viewers are more interested to watch the fight as Batman resorts to his intellect and intelligence to fight opponents who are way stronger than him. And it's this very fact which makes us all go like "Holy shit!! That was so fucking awesome! How did he do that? :-O "
(3) Lets have a look at their disguises okay. All that Superman does is change into formals and put on a pair of glasses and voila he becomes Clark Kent!Wow that makes him so bloody unrecognizable! Kinda like SRK from Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi ..and we all know how that movie was ridiculed. On the other hand nobody knows that Bruce Wayne is actually the real Batman which just proves as to how careful and efficient he his when it comes to hiding his identity which is of utmost importance when you're a superhero.
(4) Superman wears his red briefs over his costume.I think that statement speaks for itself.
(5) Superman's powers were like a gift..he was born with them. Batman had to work hard...train in martial arts...design his gadgets,his Batmobile,an effective costume which was not only bullet-proof but would also help him glide in air without the help of any shitty gadget like a jetpack which probably would be the first option on any other humans mind.
(6) Superman can't even woo a simple woman like Lois Lane. All he does is stay in the friend-zone and smile like a wuss. Batman, on the other hand is a natural chic magnet. His persona and his charisma as Bruce Wayne is irresistible to any woman. Hes the very basis on which the character of James Bond was designed.
(7) Superman's best opponent was Lex Luther who was nothing but a mortal businessman and even then he finds it hard to defeat him.But Batman has an entire cabinet full of enemies its deadliest being the infamous Joker who as everybody knows has some amazing tricks up his sleeves at all times. That makes him more challenging than Lex Luther and hence more hard to defeat. Yet Batman even manages to do that.
(8) Superman lost his parents when he was just born.He never knew them at all so he didn't have to live with any sort of grief. Batman on the other hand actually witnessed the murder of his parents and also realized that in a way it was his fault that they died. Grief + Guilt => more sympathy towards Batman.
(9) It isn't difficult to defeat Superman. All you need to do is carry a green rock in your pocket and tell him its Kryptonite. The idiot will believe you and stay away from you. You need to be really intelligent to defeat the Dark Knight though.
(10) The popularity votes that the Batman movies garner are way more than the Superman movies.
Ladies and Gentlemen... I think we have a clear winner.
LOL..this was abstract..totally :P
ReplyDeleteBut mate,
1)Even batman wears black underwear over his grey suit.
2)He can't heat food with his eyes when it gets cold..superman's laser vision scores there.
3)Batman's mask is kinda lame.
The labels..hilarious as usual :D
If they had a mano-e-mano, ON PAPER, Superman beats Batman easily. But in Frank Miller's The Dark Knight Returns, Batman does beat Superman with a little help from that archer guy (forgot his name). So, yeah.
ReplyDelete^^The 'archer guy' - Green Arrow. Nice post and totally justified if one isn't into DC Universe.
ReplyDeleteThank you!
ReplyDelete@ Ramu: Batman's underwear blends with his bat suit...does the color red gp well on blue tights?!?
Batman doesnt need laser vision to heat his food ...he has a microwave oven for that! :P
Batman's mask is lame??? C'mon!!
^
ReplyDeleteRed and blue are complimentary colors.Did't Kulkarni Sir teach this when we were kids?
*Has no answers for the other two questions, so chooses to ignore conveniently*
Did ne of us even listen to that senile old man? Batman's suit is designed to act as a camouflage ..Superman's suit or rather the red briefs seem to yell out "Look at me everybody..Im hung like a horse!"
ReplyDelete*Has been beaten. Chooses not to comment further*
ReplyDeleteAgree completely ! Batman wins hands down ! :-)
ReplyDeleteAwesome analysis !;-)
Batman = Good. But wait, I don't have a Batman tee. :( :P
ReplyDeleteNice piece, good to read someone writing on Batman vs Superman. ^_^
And Batman = Realistic than Superman. :D
ReplyDelete